When the mind has been used to the upward battle of everyday life and occasional downslides, when offered an easier and more efficient way of doing things the mind cannot accept.
It’s too familiar, too engrained and comfortable to continue the same means of doing things. The exaggerated highs and lows; the quick excitement and quickly following disappointments. It’s a constant circus of emotions, a constant wheel of pleasure and frustration.
The moment the decision is made to detach from surface level restraints, distractions and shallow content, it’s felt as an unfamiliar terrain.
The excitement at the first step of the way to remove oneself from shallow pleasures is easy.
That initial drive; that boost of momentum at the start is easy.
In the face of apathy, depression, lack of desire or lack of drive, it’s uncomfortable, undesirable and unfamiliar.
This unfamiliar terrain is a testing ground for the mind.
Initially when the momentum to go against the mind’s way and take back control, it’s felt as a kind of false immediate win over the mind.
It’s as if the mind is saying: Ok fine, I’ll let go of my grip, let’s see how you do without me!
The mind can be assured that you’ll come back eventually and more likely soon enough, if it didn’t think it was likely for your return it wouldn’t have given that initial boost at the start.
After a good amount of time has lapsed, soon enough a low point will follow. This is the testing terrain of the mind, to tempt you into frustration, enmity, dissatisfaction or any number of different emotional tensions.
The mind has a way of it’s own; it’s own tactics; tools; unconscious plans and strategies.
In moments of positivity, joy, comfort and any feeling of contentment, you can be assured that the mind is unconsciously planning to have its way one way or the other.
In moments of apathy and lack of desire, the mind is testing whether you will react by frustration, be tempted to watch TV, browse the internet, google momentary questions that seemingly came from nowhere, scroll on your phone, the ways of distraction are infinite.
It’s not necessarily the distractions themselves that are the issue it’s that the mind knows that it’s got you by the tail when it knows you are likely to turn your head to distractions. Because if it knows it can grab your attention even for a small instant it is certain you’ll be more likely to be more distracted and eventually lose your track and lose momentum towards your goal.
The mind has a few tactics up its sleeve, one of those is restlessness, insomnia and any disturbances during sleep.
One night may not be a problem, but sure enough the mind will try again and again. It gives you the problem and offers the solution.
It observes the lack of sleep and desire to get some rest, but then the mind offers you a solution called frustration and resistance.
What a perfect opportunity and time to be frustrated and be resistant, the mind says.
Upon being driven to restlessness the last thing to do is to become your thoughts or emotions.
The temptation to become your frustration, to become your thought of wanting to distract yourself from the undesirable tension of restlessness.
Once you have become your thought, the mind has won.
Upon refusal to become your thoughts and emotions, the mind loosens its grip, you’ve passed its test.
The thing about when the mind is testing you, it knows that it can’t try too hard too persuade you. It can be quite fair about it’s provocations. Once it knows it can’t force you to resist, it’s obligated to let you win that conflict.
In the state of apathy and depression it’s the same too. The mind is testing whether you will become your frustration and beg to voice complaint or any dissatisfaction. To be impatient, bored, the mind will bring you to borderline frustration after many attempts to strip you desire and energy to do things. It will try again to bring you to distraction and to pull your attention away from the present moment.
The mind will do anything to pull you away from the present moment, because that’s where lies the answer to the problem.
The answer lies deep within oneself, and the mind knows that if it can pull you away for an instant, it’s highly likely you will fall back into it’s hands.
The answer lies in being present in one’s brief and momentary experience called whatever it is being felt; in this instance it’s apathy, depression and lack of desire. In these moments the first step is to accept the feeling of this moment and to respect it as a brief experience of momentary displeasure.
This acceptance and respect for the moment is an act of humilty.
That humility is the intention of unconditional love.
An act of unconditional love is the acceptance of the different varieties of one’s emotional and mental states of being.
When you act out of unconditional love with the intention of acceptance and humility, you free the need to be frustrated, agitated or need for distraction. When this present state of being has consumed all of your attention you have rightfully given yourself permission to feel this lack of desire, depression and apathy. By claiming the right to give yourself permission to feel this way in this brief experience called life, you accept yourself unconditionally.
The spiritual empowerment and mental leverage of not attaching one’s identity to their brief experience; the connection to oneness. Taking that stance, whatever emotion or thought that rises to the surface is one to be welcomed. This emptiness that the mind cannot do anything about; at that point there’s nothing the mind can latch onto you; that’s the freedom of unrestraint. At that point the mind has to let go of its grip, because nothing will pull you away from inner peace.
To accept yourself no matter what state of being you are in is the unconditional love to take joy in any and all the experiences of yourself.
To accept yourself in moments not only in excitement and comfort but especially in low and uncomfortable states is a beautiful gift to treasure.
How can one fully accept or love themselves if they do not value all the aspect of their experiences?
The ability to have unwavering faith in yourself and to take joy in your presence enough not to be tempted by distraction, whether it be browsing the internet, scrolling on your phone, making a spontaneous google search, even listening to music. In the case of listening to music, when you catch yourself being consumed by music for an extended period to the point of getting off track, lower the music slowly and intently. The mind will respect your decision to focus on what’s more important when you carefully and not abruptly stop its amusement. Careful intention and smooth action is always the most preferred way than rushing, hastily moving, taking off abruptly, shutting down or slamming. The tempo of these movements exudes a likely chance of making mistakes and also conflict. The mind responds well to calm and collected movements.
When the wave of tension, borderline frustration, apathy, lack of desire, depression is met, you know that your doing something right. If it was constantly exciting, joyful and comfortable it wouldn’t be authentic or self assuring. If there’s no pain in the process of detaching from cheap and shallow pleasures then something must be off.
It’s about valuing the pain of tension and accepting the lack of momentum or consistency. Because the freedom of being removed form shallow attachment and the upward battle, the downslopes, the needless cycle of exaggerated excitement and frustration is not nearly as valuable as the pain that comes with self-respect, humility and discipline. That pain was meant to fuel the momentum of your dedication. The freedom of walking on a flat plane over rushing up hills and quickly falling down is more comfortable than the former means of doing things.
To take joy and pleasure in the present moment of delayed gratification. The pain of non-immediate satisfaction; to have a positive association with the pain of not giving into shallow pursuits. When the only thing you want is that which is deep inside of you, then the pain of uncertainty, discomfort and unfamiliarity is greater than giving into the spontaneous and whimsical dealings of the mind.